In Case You Didn't Get the Memo: Make Him Happy

It seems obvious, but I'm surprised by how many women didn't get the memo. If all of the effort spent on plastic surgery, fake tans, acquiring expensive hand bags, and catfighting were simply redirected, I'm convinced the world would be a better place (although I'd hate to give up my "Real Desperate Housewives" fix like everybody else). Remember: how much shit your man puts up with must be proportional to the amount of happiness you deliver.



As I've mentioned before, guys are simple, logical creatures. They measure their level of satisfaction with the relationship by the amount of time they spend being happy. In fact, they will actually project positive characteristics onto you with time well spent (whether it's surfing or taking a walk in the park, the more shared happy memories you create the better). Even if these activities could be done just as easily with a pet, the man will not be able to distinguish his happiness from affection. Building happy memories together and replicating this happiness over and over again in the relationship is what a woman should be investing in. If there's one take away point you should emblazon into memory from this blog, it is this one.

You could be the hottest person on the planet but if the majority of the relationship is spent in dire unhappiness and shouting matches, jealousy, and hormonal craziness, the hotness is no longer relevant. I know it's hard ladies, but try to save the crazy for your girl friends, who are better equipped to handle it. This includes dramatic venting and exaggeration of your every day problems, once a month period rage, and excessive nagging (men absolutely hate this). Once the amount of shit you give him begins to outweigh the amount of happiness he feels with you or for you, you are on shaky ground. Conversely, if a man spends most of the time being happy with you, you have plenty of wiggle room (trust me).

The good news is, it doesn't take much to make a man happy. Here is a list of surefire ways that could be universally applied (regardless of race or nationality):

1) Watch Family Guy with him. Even if you can't stand it. Just do it.
2) Smile. Run your hands through your hair and flip it. Men love this.
3) Laugh at his jokes. Laugh often. The goofier you are the better.
4) Be cute.
5) Do nice things for him once in a while (it doesn't have to be a grand gesture, if he loves you he's floored by anything). Examples: massaging his forehead while he's dozing off in your lap, cooking his favorite spaghetti dish, getting tickets for a show, etc.
6) Stop complaining.
7) The obvious.

Remember, a man will measure how smitten he is with you by how much of the time he spends being happy with you.